Honestly…

Hiking the Pitons Fit Holiday

On the internet we often present ‘our best life’. The things that are photoshopped, the workouts we smashed, the carefully constructed meals and outfits, and while that is what people want to see (I certainly look out for beautiful pictures of food and fashion), it’s often not an honest reflection of that person’s life. So here are a few honest truths from me to you. Thank you for reading.

  • I just got back from the most amazing holiday, yet my stress and anxiety meant that I don’t think I ever fully relaxed. It’s keeping me awake at night, and is really horrible at the moment, and the more I think about it, the more I stress out.
  • Our flat is being redecorated at the moment, which is really exciting, however it means that Tom and I have had to move out for a month. I am currently swapping between staying at a friend’s house and staying with my parents.
  • I haven’t really done any exercise, certainly no running since the Berlin Marathon 3 weeks ago.

Running the Berlin Marathon

  • I’ve written up a couple of blog posts but uploading the pictures is driving me mad- they keep having errors.
  • I really want to run the Chicago Marathon 2015, or at least enter the ballot and cross my fingers, but Tom has said no to a marathon next year. He finds it quite stressful, and to be honest training for a marathon puts quite a lot of strain on our relationship and tests his patience. I wish it didn’t but that is the truth.
  • Tom got into the London Marathon for next year (ironically). He has said he categorically does not want me to run it as this is his marathon, his time to shine. Completely fair enough, but I am sad that we can’t do my hobby together. He doesn’t want my advice on training, which I think could get quite stressful in March/April.
  • I am a little scared of the dark, but love sleeping in a total blackout.
  • I love my new WordPress site, but I have absolutely no idea what I’m doing on the backend. I keep having to text Leah to ask for help.
  • I’d really love to develop my blog further, but it feels really overwhelming and I’m not sure where to start. It’s quite scary to put yourself out there, and even scarier to think that no-one is reading content that takes a lot of time and effort to produce.
  • I want to run 1.45 half marathon next year.
  • I’ve just finished The Minimalist’s #minsgame http://www.theminimalists.com/game/, where you throw one thing away on the first day, two things the second and so on for 30 days. We played as a group of 6, and I am ashamed yet a little proud to say that I was the only one to last all 30 days. I threw away/recycled/sold a lot of crap, including more clothes than I care to mention. The sad thing is, I could keep going with this. I have hoarded things for years, my clutter has taken over the flat and enough is enough. Tom hates my mess, I hate my mess. Time for more minimalist living.

tower of books

  • I’ve streamlined my wardrobe and still have too many clothes, yet I always feel like I have nothing to wear. (A common dilemma.)
  • I worry that the more I change, the more distant I’ve become from some of my friends. I hate it.
  • I want to be nicer, more patient, kinder.
  • I love quotes. They make me feel warm and fuzzy inside. And sometimes make me cry.

Kindness quotes

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50 Comments

  1. October 17, 2014 / 8:27 am

    A great post and if i knew you i’d happily chew over some of these dilemmas over a coffee. There are many that resonate with me (relationship issues over running, a life of clutter, a lack of time to blog). I love indulging in the fantasy of Instagram streams of people on beaches, perfect lean meals,amazing runs and so-on because aspiration goes hand in hand with inspiration but to appreciate the sunshine you have to see a bit of rain too and kudos to you for posting a post with a bit of light drizzle 🙂

    • charlotte
      October 19, 2014 / 7:51 pm

      Thanks for the offer, very sweet!

  2. October 17, 2014 / 11:12 am

    I love this! Very refreshing honesty.

    • charlotte
      October 19, 2014 / 7:49 pm

      Thank you for your lovely comment!

  3. October 17, 2014 / 12:58 pm

    A great post, thank you for being brave enough to be completely honest. I often read blogs and leave with the impression that I’m doing something “wrong” because my life isn’t perfect. I guess I need to remember this… “Don’t judge a man until you’ve walked a mile in his shoes”. I hope things start to improve and that you manage to find a compromise with the London/Chicago marathons.

    • charlotte
      October 19, 2014 / 7:48 pm

      Thank you so much for your comment, and a great quote to remember. I soo want to do Chicago!

  4. October 17, 2014 / 1:38 pm

    Surround yourself by people that inspire you and will help you grow. If your friends have no aspirations or drive, then add new ones.

    Must feel a bit intense to be worrying about all those things! Maybe focus on the things that will make you feel better. Like planning to nail that 1:45

    • charlotte
      October 19, 2014 / 7:48 pm

      Wise words, thank you!

  5. October 17, 2014 / 3:13 pm

    That makes me sad that you both can’t run a marathon in the same year 🙁 My husband and me have tried to run the same marathons but it’s injury which stops us, otherwise we would. We don’t run them together as we’re different paces but having had someone experience the amazingness of the marathon you just ran is just lovely I find. Talking about the course, the crowds, your experience etc. It is stressful and hard at times in the lead-up, I don’t deny it, but that end moment when you’ve both done it is brilliant.

  6. October 17, 2014 / 5:47 pm

    Well I have just read this post in its entirety 🙂 I get your updates by email and I love them. So don’t worry, your hard work is being read somewhere!

  7. October 17, 2014 / 6:07 pm

    Wow, I have so much to say about this and wish we could have afternoon tea sooner then next month. The thing that works for me is to tackle one thing at the time, like you did for minds game. I completely relate to the change in friendships too. That one is a scary one but it is actually much better once you are surrounded by people that support you and not undermine you. Take good care of yourself Charlie xx

  8. October 17, 2014 / 6:50 pm

    Great post. Although I set my Insta shots up to be as pretty as possible, I haven’t had the easiest times over the past few years, and I think my blog reflects that. It’s comfoting to see that others have the same worries as you.

    I had a similar issue with Chris and his first 10K this summer, though thankfully he came round to accepting advice.. But only after our running club had a chuckle at his sub-40 goal! (Yes, for his first ever race, let alone 10K)
    X

    • charlotte
      October 19, 2014 / 7:52 pm

      Thank you for sharing, good to know I’m not the only one who struggles with this.

  9. October 17, 2014 / 11:07 pm

    This is beautiful! I so appreciated this, not least because I’m on a quest for minimalism as well 🙂 Thanks for sharing about your blogging struggles too; I can totally relate! Our blogs are polished and well-thought-out for a reason, but in no way do they represent the entirety of our daily experience. Thanks for writing this!!

    • charlotte
      October 19, 2014 / 7:53 pm

      Thank you so much for your comment, good luck with your minimalism quest. I’m definitely going to be continuing on with my challenge to streamline my flat!

  10. October 17, 2014 / 11:17 pm

    I love yous blog! (I mean, anyone with a race medal and a glass of champagne in their profile picture is my kind of girl.) Keep up the great work, I definitely appreciate the effort you put into this blog. =)

    • charlotte
      October 19, 2014 / 7:53 pm

      THANK YOU! That is so so nice to hear. It’s all about balance- champers and running!

  11. Karen
    October 18, 2014 / 8:13 am

    A very honest blog post, I found your blog in January this year and have checked in most weeks, your inspiration has led me to run two half marathon this year the second taking 5 mins off my first time, with your useful training tips! Thank you for opening your soul online!

    • charlotte
      October 19, 2014 / 7:54 pm

      Thank you so much for reading, and I am so pleased that you knocked off 5min from your half marathon PB. Keep up the great work!

  12. louisesfitnessjourney
    October 18, 2014 / 8:47 am

    A great post, which resonates… it actually sums up the reasons why I quit facebook – it can feel like everyone’s having such an amazing life, when in reality everyone is just sharing their ‘best of’.

    Personally I’m failing on the minimalism too, I’m also getting work done at my home which is driving me mad (having to tidy up & hide laundry, can’t get into cupboards/find things and there is dust frankly everywhere) but at least I’m on holiday for the next two weeks.

    • charlotte
      October 19, 2014 / 7:54 pm

      Hope you have a great holiday, and at least our flats will be nicer after the decorating!

  13. October 18, 2014 / 10:16 am

    Awesome post, and nice to have a little insight. Everyone has struggles and sometimes talking about them with others can help.
    I love reading your blog and from the number of other comments it looks as though others do to so don’t worry about whether it is worth it. Although, I fully understand where you’re coming from as I recently started a blog and don’t think anyone reads it.
    I love quotes too, particularly when they’re pasted on a pretty picture. My Instagram was filled with them until I found Pinterest and now have boards dedicated to quotes 🙂
    Looking forwards to your next post.

    • charlotte
      October 19, 2014 / 7:55 pm

      Thank you, will have to look at your quote board on pinterest for some inspiration!

  14. bibiveggierunners
    October 18, 2014 / 12:13 pm

    Lovely post, thank you for being to candid – it’s nice to see the other side of a blog, even if it’s not the easiest to share.

    • charlotte
      October 19, 2014 / 7:55 pm

      Thanks for your lovely comment, and thank you so much for reading!

  15. Charlotte Smith
    October 18, 2014 / 12:30 pm

    Brilliant blog, many times people don’t feel that they can share the “normalities” of life, especially us runners (it’s like everything has to be perfect, which it never is). Thank you for making everything think about this 🙂 x

    • charlotte
      October 19, 2014 / 7:57 pm

      Thank you for reading, and your lovely comment. It’s true as runners you mostly share the PBs rather than the rubbish runs!

  16. October 18, 2014 / 12:39 pm

    I can relate to so much of what you wrote. Especially, blogging. I started out just blogging for myself. I love to write, that is my first passion. My struggle now is to find that audience, that niche, without compromising what really matters to me. Still trying to find my way through blogging about life. I tell my 3rd grade students to fill their writer’s notebooks for personal narratives with writing that is: True, Meaningful, and From the Heart.

    • charlotte
      October 19, 2014 / 7:58 pm

      Great advice for writing and something I can definitely remember next time I’m blogging. Good luck with your blog, look forward to reading it!

  17. October 18, 2014 / 1:38 pm

    This is such an amazing post! So honest and refreshing to read. I too have anxiety and understand the frustration and annoyance of it. You’ve inspired me to write my own honesty post!

    • charlotte
      October 19, 2014 / 7:59 pm

      Looking forward to reading it!

  18. October 18, 2014 / 4:54 pm

    What an honest post, thanks for sharing it Charlie. I can completely relate to running/marathons putting a strain on a relationship- I hope you can come to a compromise, it seems a shame to miss you if you want to do it so much. In terms of readership of your blog- I read it all the time and love it, so don’t stop!

    • charlotte
      October 19, 2014 / 7:59 pm

      It is so hard isn’t it! I don’t want to have to compromise, I wish it all worked out wonderfully, or that Tom could run with me!

  19. Sian david
    October 18, 2014 / 6:47 pm

    Such a lovely post. I have been reading your blog since I started running nearly two years ago. Facebook is well known for showing all the best bits. I think other family / friends find it hard to understand the whole running thing too. Keep going!! Ps I love quotes too!! sian xxx

    • charlotte
      October 19, 2014 / 8:00 pm

      Thank you for your lovely comment! Nice to find other quote lovers!

  20. October 19, 2014 / 12:15 am

    A thought provoking post…

    It’s a shame you can’t figure out the both running marathons thing in the same year somehow – seems like from reading your blog you get a lot out of the marathon experience. Maybe a year to try something different – a fast half and a wine marathon maybe where speed, and to some extent, training miles don’t make so much difference. (Then of course you could take that HM speed into marathon plans for 2016!)

    I like Sebestian Keinle’s take it on from his Kona 14 Winners speech “Never judge a life on one bad day. Judge it on for the best day.” Am trying to live by this after a crappy year of unresolved injuries and barely any running.

    And if you have too many books technology has solved this problem – Kindles are totally life-changing 🙂

    • charlotte
      October 19, 2014 / 8:00 pm

      Great advice, thank you. I’ll look up that book!!

  21. October 19, 2014 / 1:47 pm

    Great post. Surprised that you are worried that no-one reads your blog- it’s always been one of my favourite fitness blogs, I always read your posts.
    Can relate to the stress of redecorating your home- I’ve got that going on at the moment.

    • charlotte
      October 19, 2014 / 8:38 pm

      Thanks for your comment, hope the house looks lovely and that your knee is better!

  22. Trina
    October 19, 2014 / 6:16 pm

    I am constantly in awe of all that you do, of all that you achieve and the smile that brightens up the day. Some friends are friends for life, some are for stages of life. Enjoy them today, for there will be more who come and go. X

    • charlotte
      October 19, 2014 / 8:38 pm

      Thank you TD, looking forward to lunch on Tues!

  23. JB
    October 19, 2014 / 9:27 pm

    Amazing post and one I can definitely relate to! So pleased to have discovered your blog recently – you are an inspiration to all female runners and its so refreshing to read your posts which are both fun and honest. Keep it up!

    • charlotte
      October 24, 2014 / 6:30 pm

      Thank you, what a lovely comment!

  24. Becky
    October 24, 2014 / 1:46 pm

    It’s so nice to read a post as honest as this, and it sets your blog apart from many others that present heavily edited lives. I understand that bloggers don’t always want to share everything online, but it is really reassuring to know that other people have similar struggles so I think you’re definitely doing good by sharing. Thank you!

    • charlotte
      October 24, 2014 / 6:21 pm

      Thank you for your message, I really appreciate it! Thanks for reading.

  25. October 24, 2014 / 10:17 pm

    So many comments already but I just wanted to say I enjoyed reading it. And I needed to read it just as I had started to feel a bit down about my “ordinary” photos and “ordinary” blog. Now I see that the real stuff is the best.

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